So You Don't Think You Are A Negotiator?

So you don’t think you are a negotiator…..well, whether you know it or not, you have been negotiating since you were born…………

Some of the more interesting concepts learned from formal negotiating training was what was learned after, through practical application. The basics of negotiating surround the concept of “If I, Will You”. In essence, if you perform or provide something, something will be provided in return. This simple concept started when you were a newborn, and transpires multiple times a day, many times unknowingly or unspoken.

To better understand the negotiating concept of If I, Will You, a few illustrations starting back at infancy:

                ~ If I feed you, will you stop crying?

                ~ If I let you borrow the car tonight, will you get your homework done now?

                ~ If I start dinner, will you take out the garbage?

                ~ If you meet your sales goals, I will provide you with a bonus

There is a misconception that a negotiation must be the proverbial win/win conclusion in order to be successful for either/or both parties involved. Rarely does a negotiation, successful or not, have the result of a win/win conclusion. As with the above examples, if I am the one taking out the trash in order to get dinner started, I may not consider that a win situation. However, understanding that the conclusion to a negotiating may not be your first choice, it is more advantageous to strive for a consensus (Webster’s definition: general agreement or concord; harmony).

The conclusion of a negotiation is one of three outcomes:

1.       Best case scenario: where you received everything you asked for and gave up little in the If I, Will You pattern

2.       Satisfactory scenario: where you received a fair amount of what was requested, giving up an equal amount in exchange

3.       Acceptable scenario: where you can live with what you received in exchanged for giving a bit more in return

Remember, it is quite rare to have both parties receive everything that they sought at the beginning of the negotiating process; if this was the case, a true negotiation may not have taken place at all.

One of the biggest deterrents to a successful negotiating is time.  If your back is against the wall in terms of how quickly you require a negotiated outcome, it can hamper your ability to negotiate effectively. It can be difficult to get a better price from the plumber when you have 4 inches of standing water in your basement. However, a specific time frame can also be used to your advantage. The best time to negotiate a great price on a new car is the last day of the month, when car dealers strive to meet sales goals and quotas.

So, if I provide you with a few tips on effective negotiating, will you use them to receive a better outcome?

                ~ Remember than consensus can be a very effective negotiating tool (and result), understanding that a win/win scenario is rare; strive for consensus where the outcome that both parties received can be lived with

                ~ Avoid the time crunch when negotiating, it can harm your chances of being successful in any negotiation; but also remember that it can be used to your advantage 

                ~ Remember the basic concept of negotiating; If I, Will You; and do not feel uncomfortable using this concept, human nature has us wired to understand that we will give something up if we receive something in return.

Just My Thoughts…………..blah, blah, blah.